Me: I think Peter Cetera made a big mistake when he left Chicago. I mean what - he had a couple duets and the theme from the Karate Kid?
Kevin: Hey the Karate Kid is a classic! I bet he made a lot of money off that song.
Me: We’re talking about the song not the movie. Do you ever here that song on the radio today? No. And Karate Kid two??? SO not a classic.
Kevin: Well it’s not THAT terrible. (This is where I try desperately to keep the coffee from coming up my nose.)
Me: Did the chick that Mr. Miagi loves in part 2 leave Okinawa and come back with them?
Kevin: No
Me: Why is it the movies end with them getting the girl, but then at the start of the sequel they’ve broken up?
Kevin: Well in 2 Ralph broke up with the girl…
Me: No no no Elizabeth shoe dumped his ass.
Kevin: Yeah but only because he wouldn’t put out.
Me: You’re telling me Elizabeth Shoe dumped Daniel because he wouldn’t have sex with her?
Kevin: Yeah. But in part 2 it was the other way around. See, Daniel wanted to get some but the oriental girl was all good.
Me: Asian. People are Asian – things are Oriental.
Kevin: Whatever. They didn’t start getting bad tough until Karate Kid 4. Three was ok.
Me: With Hillary Swank?
Kevin: No Ralph Machio.
Me: There’s no Karate Kid 3 with Ralph Machio.
Kevin: Yes there is - Ralph Machio and Mr. Miagi try to open their own dojo but the punk with the spiky hair messes it all up. You know the spiky haired guy – what’s his name? Eric….Eric Barnes*. Daniel tries to crane kick him but he catches his foot. That one’s not as bad as 4.
Me: So part 4 is the one with Hillary Swank.
Kevin: Yeah – she’s not hot yet. And the karate isn’t even that good.
*The rival fighter character in KK3 was named Mike Barnes, not Eric.
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When was Hillary Swank ever hot?
ReplyDeleteAw poor Hillary Swank - I think she's pretty in a non-conventional way. Apperantly her ass-kicking in Karate Kid 4 wasn't up to par, thus not being hot. Kevin's a sucker for any ass-kicking chick, and she kicked ass as a boxer in "Million Dollar Baby". At least I hope that was the turning movie for his "Hillary-Swank-Is-Hot" opine - if it was "Boy's Don't Cry" we have a big problem.
ReplyDeleteI personally prefer her kick-ass-ness in Iron Jawed Angels when she was all "You wanna arrest me for protesting that women can't vote? I'll show you - we'll starve ourselves." At least then women were starving themselves for a cause.